Application Letter to a Site

[boeoz]

Hey guys, I'm new to these forums, but figured this was the best place to ask for advice.

Basically, I'm applying to a pretty big name website, and I just wanted someone to check through my application letter. I figured people on here might understand better what the reader will be looking for when he/she reads my application.

So, here it is, slightly censored.
Any comments would be highly appreciated.
Thanks!

Dear Phillip,

My name is - and I am an aspiring journalist as well as an avid video gamer, currently based in England, looking to get into the video game journalism industry.

I am a passionate writer as well as a passionate gamer and have been for as long as I can remember. For the past three years now, I've wanted to become a part of the video game journalism industry, and to learn the ins-and-outs of the trade, and also to become involved with the gaming community at large. For these reasons, I started my own independent blog , and whilst I feel relatively satisfied with the site, I do have a feeling that it's seen as 'just another WordPress blog' in a sea of thousands. That's why I'm looking to advance my profile and to gain experience by ambitiously applying to a big-name website such as yourselves.

My Online activity can vary from 4 hours a day, to 11 hours a day, but rest assured, I meet the requirements of 3 hours of Online activity per day.
I am currently based in -; a city in the - of England.

I have included a link to my blog for you to browse through, but I appreciate that you are most likely strapped for time with such a busy schedule, so I have included here some examples of my work;

The warnings that should've been ; an article detailing personal annoyances present in video games.

Wii games that you should be excited for ; a list of Wii games that hold promise, and our pertaining reasons as to why that is. -- It should be noted that this list is rather outdated, and as such, does not include games that were announced at the Tokyo Games Show, Nintendo's October Media Summit, or any games announced thereafter.

Game Focus: The Conduit ; a look at the up-and-coming Wii FPS, The Conduit.

As I'm sure you have noticed, my blog is focused on the Wii market, but this does not in any way limit my knowledge of the current generation of systems as I follow news and announcements for all the major platforms and am a happy owner of an Xbox 360.

You may also have noticed that I'm only 15 years of age. Despite this, I believe that I hold perfectly adequate linguistic and journalistic potential; I am always willing to learn and I am highly appreciative of every chance I get of heightening my skill.

If you wish to get in contact with me, you can do so via the following methods;
E-Mail; -
MSN/Hotmail; -
AIM: -

I'd like to thank you for taking time out of your schedule to read this, and I look forward to hearing from you in the future.

Kind regards
Rory ****er

[ccontinisio]

I... think you're a little too young. The guys at the site will probably prefer someone else just because of the age, since they think (and... they're right) that a bigger one will be more professional and trusty. I'm not talking about you, I'm talking in general.

Anyway, try all the same. The worst thing that could happen is that they refuse, and you can try again three years or so from now.

Good luck.

[jp2123]

Originally Posted by ccontinisio

I... think you're a little too young. The guys at the site will probably prefer someone else just because of the age, since they think (and... they're right) that a bigger one will be more professional and trusty. I'm not talking about you, I'm talking in general.

Anyway, try all the same. The worst thing that could happen is that they refuse, and you can try again three years or so from now.

Good luck.

The age surely will hurt. However, I'm looking for writers for my site. I don't think you will be interested since you are looking for a bigger site, but it might serve you as experience . Well, if you want to check it out, is http://twgnews.com. And my email is jp2123@twgnews.com

[boeoz]

I thought that, but in the end I just came to the conclusion of "why not?".

And if anyone was wondering, they're not a massive site, really.
It was a voluntary position at Kombo, so nothing huge.

[jp2123]

ohhk... well if you still are interested and they don't accept you. I will

[yaustar]

Too long. By the time I got to the second paragraph, I still didn't know why you were writing to them. Semi colons were also used incorrectly.